Ever do life coaching in front of a mirror?

Any coaches out there will know what I mean. You start going through some stuff in life and then you get a new client. The two of you get chatting and then all of a sudden, you discover that they are going through exactly what you are going through.

I was recently coaching someone when I realised this, or should I say remembered it. I actually laughed to myself and literally said to that person “I’m going to have a little chat with myself right now. Feel free to listen in!”

You see, when we need to understand something in life, the universe doesn’t just give you the skills, as otherwise there would be no challenge and no reason to grow and develop. Rather, it gives us situations where we are able to practice those skills.

For example, if you know you need to be more patient in your life, it will keep putting you in traffic jams. Should you need to learn to relax more, it will give you more people that try and make you angry.

There is a great bit in the book Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman where Socrates is rude to some spiritual people and polite to an angry person. When asked why, Socrates tells Dan that he gave them what they needed at that time in their lives.

What lessons are you being taught right now? Maybe you aren’t a coach, and so may not have people reflecting back to you what you need to understand. However, I can pretty much guarantee that you have ’stuff’ (technical term!)` going on around you, and it is that ’stuff’ which is there to teach you the things you need to learn in order to get to the next level in your life and personal evolution.

Sometimes, and you may be there right now, the lessons seem to be coming from all angles at all times. You may feel overwhelmed. Believe it or not, this too is yet another lesson. Where else in your life do you need to be able to balance things more effectively? Where else may you need to learn to say no?

Stop for a moment right now and think, unemotionally, about everything that is going on around you right now. Make a list of each of them, and then besides that, write out what you think it is there to teach you. The universe is always giving you the exact learnings you need and at the right time, so work out what it is you need to take away from this time in your life. Now you know what you are there to learn, don’t fight against it, but instead be curious as to how you can learn  quickly and effectively (and hopefully painlessly!) from this situation which has given you the chance to become even more of yourself.

Now, look at your past and recent actions. Notice how they have served you, and how some of them may not. Decide what you need to do differently from now. You will need to change your behaviours in order to get through this. Like a fly trying to escape through a window, you can try and bash yourself through, but the chances are that you will just end up tiring yourself out and giving yourself a headache. Instead, look for an open window, and if there isn’t one, maybe there is someone around you who can open one for you… if only you would ask them?!?!

When you get good at dealing with your current level of ’stuff’, the universe will upgrade you to a different level of ’stuff’. However, now you have the skills to deal with it, so the challenge will be different. The good thing about this is where there is adversity, there is also reward.

Wherever you are right now is exactly where you are meant to be. Learn from it. Grow with it. Ask for help if necessary. You will come through the other side a stronger, more complete person. You only have obstacles if you are going somewhere, and you know the place you are going. Enjoy the journey, live in the moment and when you notice this happening again, its ok to laugh!